Bullying.

So at school our deputy head has started a campaign to stop bullying.

In our citizenship class we are currently covering homophobic bullying, bullying being the main topic.

And can I just say bullying sucks. It changes a person dramatically from the inside out. That confident person changes if bullying attacks them. And even after you get bullied the aftermath, it's something that will never leave you; it's a permanent scar in the back of your head. FAJ would agree with me on this. In primary school she wasn't exactly... Liked. And I would feel so sorry for her, I knew what she was going through.

I used to be bullied, I'm not now though. Looking at me when I'm by myself, I would look like a person who has been bullied. I'm a shy person by myself, the stupid one who smiles idiotically when they walk by themselves, remembering a happy moment. With my friends I'm not shy, but see, I'm not a people person. Some people I click with others I can't.

I have had three bullies in my life. One in reception to year two I think, two people in year one then in my religious classes after school there use to be that classic mean girls group who will call you names, call you fat, anything to see you in pain.

My first bully was a year older than me and I've been to his house, multiple times. Yes, he. He went to the same primary as me for like a year then I think he moved. As IK would say PRAISE ZE LORD. He would bully me at school then when I would go round to his house after school because his mum used to be my babysitter whilst my mum would be at uni. He... He would you know, do the typical physical bullying, punches, pinches, slaps. Then mild verbal, name calling and weight judging. He would try and have a go at my friends, the small group I had. I would back my friends up, tell him to stay away. My friends would be terrified and tell me not to go up to him, but I went anyway. He would tell me to leave them alone, he would then punch or pinch me. He would bring me to the point of tears in front of him. One reason why showing any signs of weakness around anyone is a no go for me. Then after school I would go home and we would sit in his older sisters room. His older sister knew he bullied me. One time I got physically hurt and his older sister shouted at him and brought me to his mum. His mum said he was just in a bad mood. My mum didn't believe me either, she still wouldn't, I think they think he's an angel child, puh-lease. His grandma, another one of my old babysitters lives next to me so I occasionally see him. And that's why when SP, SK and FAJ tease me about liking him I get sooo mad because he used to bully me. All they know is that I hate him but they don't know why, if they read this blog post, then maybe they will.

My second bullies. Yes plural. Were a guy and a girl, they weren't overly popular themselves. The girl was the main bully the guy would eventually leave. Thankfully my really good friend at the time would always be near to save me. But the fact I would need saving was so petty, I hated it. Luckily it was short and not as bad as my first case.

My last were the most, please excuse my language, bitcheist girls ever. It was about four or five girls and oh my... They had like two leaders who I apsolutely hate, even till today. One tries to befriend me, SP, IK and SK to this day but we have each other and frankly we would prefer not to know her. She used to be sooo rude. She basically thought she was a queen bee. She was, sorry, is, a legitimate stick, she is so skinny. She went to SP, IK and SK's school and my after school classes. She was the longest one I have known and the last years I knew her were by far not the worst. She wasn't as harsh but we definitely had no excuse to act like we liked her, you could smell the hate a mile away.

My first bully was evidently my worst. I'm lucky to have only had these many. There have been like picking on but I can hold my ground now. I think I've built walls up for myself, but I'm not a strong person, despite myself and I think they'll come just as easily down.

I feel like I've just complained a whole tonne and I'm sorry for being a burden.

I hope this doesn't affect the way you see me. In a bad way to say the least, gosh I sound so vain...

Hopefully you've learnt a bit more about me.

Bye buttercups

-STx